"It is not selfish to refill your own cup so that you can pour into others. It's not just a luxury. It is essential."
"You can't pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself first."
Those quotes are not my words , but they are true words, and very representitive of my life today.
This morning I woke up with a migraine. It hurt to move. Heck, it hurt to BLINK. And I overslept too, so I had a limited ammount of time to get the kids and dogs fed, get myself ready for work, get th kids ready to go to nannas. I had to move at hyper speed when I could barely move at normal speed.
I had a 9 hour day at work today too, and a visit from the DM, and the computers not working properly and customers getting mad at me because I was moving slowly and assuming I didn't "want" to help them because it took me several seconds to form a coherent sentence in response to their questions.
Meanwhile, 5 and a half hours later when I finally got lunch, my head was still killing me. But I got lunch, so YUM!
I took a fisful of ibuprofin and kept on chugging.
Then I came home to a kitchen full of filthy dishes. So I was having to wash dishes, and cook my supper at the same time.
Also, my oldest boy wanted to play with his paint spinner. I told him no to start with, and he looked so sad, so I gave in and let him play with it. I hate being the parent to always say no, becaue I'm always the one who gets home late in the evening in a horrible mood.
|Parker playing with his spin art. Spencer playing with Parker's batman toy.|
Meanwhile, as I finally sat down to eat I told the boys to put their toys away, and they did. That meant I had to clean all the splashed everywhere paint from the paint spinner of coures. I sat down to eat finally, but then they started to bicker and fight.
My head still hurt. I was tired. I had not stopped moving since I rolled out of bed this morning. I had had enough.
"Time for bed" I announced. That sent the little one into hysterics and the older one saying, "Is the dryer done yet?"
Turns out their dad (who shut himself up in the bedroom to watch TV the moment I got home from work) had washed their clothes, and their bed covers. And they were still in the dryer.
So I went outside to the pantry where the dryer is. Took TWO loads of clothes from the dryer inside (because the hubby always overloads). FINALLY got the kids put to bed, then had to fold all of their laundry.
(Yes, I'm aware that there are people who would LOVE to have my kind of problems but...)
By this point my cup was COMPLETELY empty. I was irate. I was muttering under my breath, spewing foul words and slamming and banging things everywhere. I still had not had supper, my head still hurt, I was exhausted beyond beleif, and I still had a blog post and no fewer than 1667 words to write on a NaNoWriMo novel that I had no plot for.
So I decided to take a bath.
When I'm pretty sure I'm going to come completely mentally unraveled, I do "Hot Bath Therapy" in which I run a scalding tub of water and sit in it forever. Or until it cools off. I take in a cup of hot coffee (decaf tonight) and a good book.
I won't say my cup is overflowing now. In fact its barely half full. But, at least there is SOMETHING in there. So if my kid wakes up in the middle of the night and needs a cuddle with mommy I can PROBABLY do that and be nice about it.
Now, I've goten my first #NaBloPoMo blog written, so I can quit stressing about that.
I've still got to get something written for my NaNo novel, and maybe some sleep, and hopefully the alien in my brain will have moved on.
But for the time being Hot Bath Therapy eased my mini-breakdown of the night.
I just wish it were good enough to melt the hardcore depression when it sets in.
But we'll burn that bridge when we get there.
(inspired by a prompt from BlogHer's NaBloPoMo)