Saturday, August 29, 2015

My Actual Shed


Yesterday while I was on my "I Wanna She Shed but I can't afford $4,000+ to get one" kick, a friend pointed out that it doesn't have to be a NEW shed.

Most She Sheds are, in fact, "reclaimed" storage or tool sheds.  And, as you can tell in the photo above, we have one of those.

On the outside its not that bad.  I mean, clearly it needs to be power washed, and some of the jungle needs to be trimmed away from it, but other than that its got a lot going for it.

On the outside.

Inside is a different story.

Above we see what is probably the most fixable thing about this.  The steps are broken.  They've been broken for a while.  And the makeshift brick step is much lower than the threshold.  But, that's okay.  That's fixable.

What is inside isn't as easily made better.

 ENTER THE STORAGE SHED OF DOOM!!!

Honestly, I don't like to step into my shed beyond the threshold.  If its deep enough in that I have to take a couple of steps, I don't venture in to get it and just do without.

If you keep reading you'll find out why.


Okay, "Storage Shed of Doom" is probably a little overly dramatic for my shed.  But it is a storage shed of..well..storage.  You can see our Christmas reindeer and our holiday Yoda hanging out 'til the day after Thanksgiving rolls around.  You can see my stored "I currently don't have a rodent so lets get this stuff out of the house" paraphernalia. You can see my sons Lightning McQueen power wheel (you can't see my other son's Mario Kart power wheel, but its in there too.)

These are all outdoor things that need storage, therefore they are stored in our outdoor storage shed.


Now lets look to the right.  THIS is where it become a little more problematic.  All those boxes.  All that STUFF, is my husband's things.  We have no room in the house for these things, so they live here.

This is what it looks like after a CLEANING.

A few months ago he did finally get rid of some stuff.  This is the stuff that he can't live withouth, that he ABSOLUTELY cannot part with.

There are broken VCRs in there that he "might have repaired one day."  And there are empty boxes from every electronic toy and lego set ever.  And there are boxes of old magazines.  And there are boxes.  And there are Boxes.  And there is a papasan chair that has no cushion but he won't get rid of, because he likes it.  (Which, come to think of it, with a coat of white spray paint and a new cushion would fit in my Imaginary She Shed pretty well)

But even if someone turned the AC on in Hell, there is one more reason I could never, ever, ever, EVER remake this into a place for me (and why I don't like to go in any farther than one step into the building):

EVIL COBWEBS OF DOOM


Well, THAT is a cobweb, but there are lots of active webs in this place too.  And what do they house?  They house these:


That, my friends, is a Kukulcania hibernalis or Southern House Spider, and it is the biggest, fattest, blackest, juiciest, scariest looking spider that Georgia has to offer.  And this shed is FULL of them.

Once upon a time I reached into a bag of pine chips in the shed and came out with a fist-full of this hell-spawn.

Now, they are not deadly, but I don't fancy sitting down to write and having one of these heifers climbing up my leg either!

Now, even if I could get rid of my husbands junk, and get rid of the eight legged nightmares, there is still ONE more factor.

This place STINKS.  Like only really old places that have been unused for a really long time can stink.  That shed was old when we bought this house, and its even older than that now!  And its always just been a giant junk room, hardly opened.  I'm not sure there is enough air freshener in the world to get the stink out of the wood this shed is built of.

***

Now, even if hubby did clear his stuff out, and I was able to scrub, de-stink and de-spider the shed to my liking, I would still have a lot of outdoor storage to share my space with, which would defeat the purpose.

So I still want (and still can't afford) my own she shed.

2 comments:

  1. Hell-spawn?
    It's just a cute spidey!

    I hope to see you at http://image-in-ing.blogspot.com/2015/08/bennett-place-bit-of-history.html and each week for the Wordless Wednesday (on Tuesday) photo linky!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love many, many animals, and tolerate many more that others loathe, but the only spiders I like are the ones miles and miles away from me.

      Delete

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